Gemini Moon

I don't know where to put this all down, this mess in my head.

My life seems set: condo in Dallas, well paying wfh job, I'm hot, still relatively young, I get dates no problem, I have fun hobbies, I have great family and a few good friends.

Why am I always restless and wanting? Seeing the negative?

I mean living in fascist America with no recourse for the bullshit we are getting into and goddess knows how we'll escape or how long it will take to rebuild. You wanna tell me there is a god that let this shit happen? God isn't even dead that dude never existed. Just an egregore of patriarchal hubris. As evidenced by the pedophile malignant narcissist they made their new Savior...but I digress.

I've tried writing songs again, I've got a few in the chamber but the fact that my current releases have like a collective 1,000 streams it's annoying to put in the work with so little pay off. Sure people make music not for the attention but the emotion, but I feel those emotions when I sing to myself.

It's safer there too. With just myself. I can't hide my emotions, I feel a fire shut up in my bones when I perceive injustice, I need to speak out...even to my own detriment. It messes with my relationships, and honestly, even my job right now. I've spoken up and I might be in danger girl...

I don't know. In the end maybe it's just my Gemini heart that's restless and my Aquarius sun that wants to take down any injustice, and my Cancer rising that makes me feel everyone's emotions at 1000%. Hopefully I figure it out, standby...